Before you get all riled up and bothered, YES, ‘hellcrap’ IS one word. Wanna make something of it?
I’m getting on my soapbox for a deliberate diatribe, a sad soliloquy, a tirade of mis-triumph, a rendering of ramble, an open letter of lament, and a decrying of despair. Although, it’s not an actual open letter, per se, but screw it. Just go with it. You get the picture.
I loathe you. I tired. I created an author page. Like me! Like me! Then I found out that I was supposed to create a profile page first. I tired again. I loathe you, still.
My second page turned out to be another author page. My fault. I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. I hid from social media for so long that it is now taunting me. Laughing and taunting. At me.
I Googled for a way to transfer one of those two author pages into a profile page. Thought it’d be easy. No problem. I really tried. I did. I was wrong. So seriously—fucking—wrong. Still loathing.
You’d think a guy who created this thing at, hell, I don’t know, twenty, could think of a way to make the whole converting of a page-to-profile thing easy. Seriously! Hey Mark, I’m talking to you. You there? Guess not since no one ever emailed me back from my request. Still waiting. Waiting.
Waiting and loathing. Still loathing. Seething and loathing. Still.
I’ve decided to just leave both author pages. Why? Not even sure. Easier I guess. Less painful. I have a headache. All of the above. Now I have three Facebook pages. Yeah, I’m all over that fucker. It’s just how I’m gonna roll with Facebook. Might even create another one. Watch me!
Yours in loathing,
LIKE me all over. Everywhere. Always. I’m pushing for omnipresence. Facebook omnipresence. LIKE ME HERE! LIKE ME THERE! LIKE ME EVERYWHERE! Yeah, click every single one. and LIKE ME dammit.
“Man, you can’t buy this kind of press. This is awesome,” says Mark Zuckerberg after reading this post. He’s sipping margaritas and eating grapes out of a bowl made of money and sending tweets to his peeps instructing them NOT to respond to Winterberg’s cries for help.